Dumb girls

I’ve noticed that boys are amused when girls are dumb. This isn’t a new realization. This dates back to sixth grade at the baseball field, when Lisa S--, in full-on flirt mode, asked Chris C--, “Which end of the bat do I hold?” He was falling all over himself to show her the correct positioning of her fingers around the narrow end of the bat. Very impressive maneuver, Lisa, very impressive. (To this day, my mom still refers to dumb-girl behavior as “Which end of the bat do I hold?”)

I had a friend who managed a Tire Kingdom. He told me that he would rotate my tires for free if I brought my car into the shop. (Ahh, it is good to have friends in high places.)

“You know, when I was younger,” I said to him, “I didn’t know why someone would have to get their tires rotated. I thought they rotated when you drove.”

The silence from his end of the conversation was only momentary -- momentary silence followed by ear-splitting yowls of laughter. “Rotate when you drive! I love it,” he cackled. I felt dumb, but entertaining. The next day, my don’t-they-rotate-when-you-drive theory became legendary at that Tire Kingdom. In fact, some of the tire monkeys probably still get a laugh out of it.

When we were 16, my friend Sarah’s dad asked her what kind of gas she put in her car. He wanted to know the octane.

“I get the oldest stuff,” she said. “The stuff they drilled in ‘87, I think.”

Yes kids, she actually thought those were years.

So the next time the dumb girl in your life shares a confused tidbit with you, just lean back and laugh. The entertainment factor is the best part about knowing a dumb girl.